"Okay," Barney said. "This is what you do. You tell them you only used steroids, so you could play better, and get more women to sleep with you."

"What?" Alex asked. "How is that even remotely useful?"

"Uh, anything can be excused if it gets you more sex."

"You remember I was married, right?"

"Married?" Barney spit out his drink. "What did you do a thing like that for?"

"Okay," Alex said. "Let me get this straight. Steroids are okay, but marriage isn't?"

"Duh! I'm going to have to re-think this friendship." Barney stood up and gave Alex one last look. "Marriage, bro. Really?" He shook his head and left.